


Flash of a Blade

by vitaminanime



Category: Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Bantering, Basements, Codes and Cyphers, Contemplation, Darkness, Eating, Eldritch locations, Envoys, Exploring, Lightsaber Duels, Lost Civilizations, Lovecraftian Monster(s), Lovecraftian Themes, Stargazing, Sunsets, Temples, Vomiting, staircases, strange planets
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-19
Updated: 2020-02-19
Packaged: 2021-02-27 22:54:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,754
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22783615
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vitaminanime/pseuds/vitaminanime
Summary: Skyguy and Snips find themselves alone on a diplomatic mission to a dark planet whose ruler is a little too indifferent for comfort.
Relationships: Anakin Skywalker & Ahsoka Tano
Comments: 7
Kudos: 11





	Flash of a Blade

"Do you have the coordinates, Snips?" Said Anakin.

"I'm entering them right now. By rights this planet should not support life, it's so far away from its sun. Yet apparantly it has all the qualities necessary to support life. Its atmosphere is composed primarily of oxygen and hydrogen, it has a molten core, a magnetic field, and a moon, but its orbit is so elliptical it may be difficult to find it." Said Ahsoka.

"We'll find it no sweat." Said Anakin.

"Hold on, almost done entering the coordinates to...how are you supposed to pronounce this? Ratllj-"

"Ratl-yost." Interrupted Anakin.

"Isn't there a J? Shouldn't it be Ratil-Jost?" Said Ahsoka.

"I think it's more of an 'uhh' sound." Said Anakin.

"Ratlljóst." Said Ahsoka.

"Close enough." Said Anakin. "Now let's make a move of it. Even if we go at light speed the whole time, the voyage will take at least five hours." He threw the switch and they went into hyperspace.

"I think we're lost." Said Ahsoka.

"You have to get lost to find a place nobody knows where it is. Then nobody would be able to find it." Said Anakin.

"Well, we're here." Said Anakin, pushing the lever that took them out of hyperspace. Rattljóst loomed below them, its atmosphere an odd shade of purple, its surface a mottled patchwork of gray and green, its rings surrounding it.

"What a dinky little planet." Said Ahsoka.

"Dinky or not, our diligence won't wait." Said Anakin as he began their entry.

"DID YOU HAVE TO GO STRAIGHT THROUGH ITS RINGS?" Gasped Ahsoka.

"It's a shortcut." Said Anakin.

"Shortcuts make for long delays." Said Ahsoka. "Quick! Get out of the way of that rock before it batters us."

Anakin pitched the spacecraft out of the way of an incoming rock.

"Skyguy! Do a barrel roll!" Ahsoka screeched as Anakin did just that.

"That chunk of rock was the size of a refrigerator!" Said Ahsoka. Anakin did another barrel roll in the opposite direction.

"Now I don't know which end is up." Said Ahsoka.

"Rely on the dials." Said Anakin.

"I don't remember which dial is which." Said Ahsoka.

Finally they entered Ratlljóst's atmosphere. Anakin raised up the ailerons and began their descent.

They bumped and scraped against the surface of Rattljóst with only minimal damage to the landing gear.

"That was easy." Said Anakin as he vaulted out of the spaceceaft.

"Easy? Easy my foot! Said Ahsoka. Her knees were wobbly and she was green around the gills. She then threw up in the knee-high grass beside the spacecraft. "I just lost my lunch."

"Find it." Said Anakin.

"I know where it is! It's at my feet!" Said Ahsoka. "But I'm not about to put it back in me."

"Fine. We don't have all day." Said Anakin.

"A day on Ratlljóst is only six hours, or so I'm told." Said Ahsoka. A bit of the color returned to her cheeks. "But considering how far away it is from its sun it might be hard to tell day from night." As it was, the sun, a tiny speck in the sky, was getting lower on the horizon, and the purplish-grayish blackish sky was beginning to turn several shades of blue.

"In that case we don't have all night. Follow me, Snips. Let's find the ruler of this place show them how we feel." Said Anakin. He began to head off across the grassy plains with Ahsoka close behind him.

"We're not here to show them how we feel, Skyguy. We're envoys, and we're here to appeal to them. If they are neutral, they can't stay neutral for much longer, the way things are headed for." Said Ahsoka.

"You're no fun." Said Anakin.

"We're not here to have fun. If they wanted us to have fun they would have sent us as envoys to that planet with thirty-six hour days where it's always summer and everyone is always playing music and eating deep-fried swamp creatures and drinking sweet red cocktails that induce altered states of consciousness." Said Ahsoka.

"It doesn't sound like we would get a whole lot of envoy-ing done there." Said Anakin.

"You said I wasn't any fun." Said Ahsoka. She then stumbled and almost tripped over a rock.

She knelt down and examined the rock. "This isn't just an ordinary rock, this is a brick." She pushed some weeds aside. Several more bricks lay underneath. "These are ruins of a building." She examined the perimeter. "A house of some kind."

"If it's a house then nobody has lived here for quite some time." Said Anakin.

"And nobody lives here now." Said Ahsoka. They continued across the plain. The sun finally sunk below the horizon. The moon had not yet risen, and they continued trudging through the darkness.

At length, Ahsoka sat down on a rock, unwrapped a packet of rations, and gazed up at the sky.

"You know, this place is actually kind of beautiful." Said Ahsoka.

"If you very loosely define beautiful." Said Anakin.

"In its own bizarre, magical, blasphemous way it is." Said Ahsoka. She took out a packet of rations and sat down on a rock. "To think of it." She gazed up at the galactic band that extended over the dome of the night sky. "The galaxy seems so huge and vast when we're in it, but when put into perspective from up here, it's nothing more than a tiny pink smudge, floating through space and time."

"Tiny? It extends to all corners of the sky." Said Anakin. "And since when did you become all philosophical?"

"But in the grand scheme of things, it is. It's just one piece in a vast puzzle. When we're gone forever, it'll still be here. Kind of makes you ponder your own insignificance. What came before us, and what comes after us. If maybe we're not alone. If maybe there are entities that predate the galaxy and are fated to outlive it. If there are beings that predate the universe and are fated to outlive it. Makes our own existence seem insignificant by comparison." Said Ahsoka.

"My own insignificance? I don't have an insignificant bone in my body." Said Anakin.

"I knew that, Skyguy." Said Ahsoka. She took a bite of ration. "But some may beg to differ." She crammed the rest of the rations down her throat and they continued.

They then came to a village of dark crumbling stone and began to explore it.

"It seems there's evidence of intelligent life everywhere, but aside from myself, there's no signs of intelligent life anywhere." Said Ahsoka.

"I heard that." Said Anakin.

"You were supposed to." Said Ahsoka.

"Well, there's no dignitaries or heads of state around here. Let's keep moving." Said Anakin as they left.

The plains of gray grass ended, and were replaced with lichens of some sort. An imposing building surmounted the horizon.

"That's an important looking building." Said Anakin as he peered at it through binoculars.

"Indeed, Captain Obvious." Said Ahsoka as she took the binoculars from him. "Maybe there's someone we could talk to there."

They headed up to the temple. The moon had risen in all its gibbous, bright red, eldritch glory. It made the temple cast a menacing shadow over Anakin and Ahsoka.

"This is definitely a sign of highly intelligent life. Look at those doric columns and stairs and pediments and dentil cornices." Said Ahsoka.

"Since when did you become an architecture buff?" Said Anakin. "Let's go inside."

They climbed up the stairs, past the doric columns, and stood in the foyer.

"It was so neat and orderly on the outside, but inside...those stairs are all going in repeating directions and the floor appears to be the ceiling and the ceiling appears to be the floor." Said Ahsoka. Anakin tried the door to the main sanctuary. He pushed on them and rattled the knobs. "It's locked." He said. Anakin began to climb up one of the flights of stairs.

"Skyguy! Don't climb up those stairs! You'll crack your head open!" Snapped Ahsoka when she instinctively began to follow him up the upside-down flight of stairs.

"I thought you said I would crack my head open." Said Anakin to Ahsoka as they reached the top of the stairs and opened the door at the top.

They finally reached the inner sanctum of the temple. At the far end of the inner sanctum was a raised dais with a high-backed chair, but the chair was empty. An androgynous figure who seemed to be made of bronze sat on the dais. A hellhound lay at its feet.

"It's almost as if someone were...expecting us." Said Ahsoka. They approached the figure on the dais.

The figure raised its head. "Greetings, children. I wasn't expecting you to figure it out so quickly. What, pray tell, is the intention for your visit for this land obscure and lonely, of which I have been assigned stewardship?"

"We're envoys on behalf of the Republic." Said Anakin.

"Has the Republic grown so bold as to send children as envoys, and under no guard at that?" Said the figure.

"We're not children and we don't need guards!" Said Ahsoka indignantly. She lunged forward but Anakin held her back.

"I am Anakin Skywalker and this is my padawan, Ahsoka Tano. The Republic has sent us here because the war shows no signs of improving. If you are neutral, you won't be able to remain neutral for long." Said Anakin.

"If you don't get involved soon, the Separatists might plunder this place, colonize it, invade it...if you have any people, and I know you do, don't play dumb with me, and you value them, you will do something about it." Said Ahsoka.

"Why should I get involved? Death on both sides has become a way of life, but to what end? I've seen countless civilizations come and go. Separatist, Republic, all the same to me, as long as I find what I need. Children, it is really and truly folly to even attempt to appeal to me. Civilizations, orders, anarchies...all of them die as they live in a flash of a blade." The figure scratched the hellhound between the ears.

"So what our lives are short? If you join sides with the Republic, we get resources and manpower, wherever it is, and you get protection from the Separatists. It's an offer you can't refuse." Said Anakin.

"Of course I can refuse, and I will refuse." Said the steward.

"How can you be so blind? Are you aware of the consequences of if you don't align yourself with the Republic? The Separatists will walk all over you and with the way that things are headed for that really won't be long." Said Ahsoka.

"I am fully aware of the consequences. It just so happens I'm a man of no consequence." Said the steward.

"I was wondering what his gender was." Whispered Ahsoka to Anakin.

"At this point we need everyone we can get on our side. We know your people are intelligent, even if you keep them hidden. They will be valuable assets to us and we will be valuable assets to you." Said Anakin.

"Children, children, children, you're using incessance rather than logic. Your kind do love to kill each other. I would find it rather amusing if it weren't so tragic. Your kind are capable of so many magnificent things, and yet somehow you have managed to invent animosity!" The steward laughed at his own joke. "But for your kind time does not come cheap. You've come the long way and have been through crepuscular realms. While you are here, make your time worthwhile. Go to the nearest citadel. There, you might find some useful...information."

"We came all this way to have an audience with you and you just tell us to run along?" Said Anakin.

"Let me tell you a story. About a play. A play that has not yet been written yet." Said the steward.

"Not yet been written? How is that even possible?" Said Ahsoka.

"The future the past and the present are one with me. I remember everything that is going to happen as if it will happen yesterday. Someday, someone will write a play, and in the play, there will be a blaster on the wall as a stage prop. It seems to be of no significance. In the first act, someone takes it away, and we think we will never see it again. In the second act, it returns, and is of minor significance, then is put away, then in the third act, it returns and is of utmost importance to the play's plot. If you seek to continue, go downwards and north." The steward then vanished. Only the hellhound remained, lying on the dais.

"We might as well make ourselves useful." Said Ahsoka. They headed back down the upside-down staircase and out of the temple.

"What do you suppose he meant by 'go downwards and north?'" Said Anakin.

"Your guess is just as good as mine." Ahsoka took out her compass and oriented it. "I have no idea which way is north on this planet, but this will have to do." And they headed to the alleged north.

They trudged down a steep hill, and then climbed up its other side. The foot of the hill was graced by an enormous, squat building of cyclopean stone.

"I suppose this is what he meant." Said Anakin.

"It would have been a lot easier of he just told us to go uphill in both directions." Said Ahsoka.

"This isn't a man who does things the easy way, Snips." Said Anakin.

"If you wanna know someone else who never does anything the easy way you can look in a mirror." Said Ahsoka.

"Let's look inside." Said Anakin as they went towards the citadel and entered.

They activated a lantern and took a good look at the room. On the left wall, it was carved with pictures, and the right wall was carved with harsh, choppy glyphs. In the center of the room was a huge stone wheel with more arcane glyphs carved in.

"I'm going to make sense of these pictures, you can decode those glyphs." Said Anakin as he went over to the wall.

"The padawan always gets the dirty work." Said Ahsoka as she examined the glyphs. "I don't make heads or tales of this."

She then turned to the center of the room and noticed the stone in the middle had the same glyphs. She pushed it around multiple times to match it with the glyphs to no avail.

"I'm about ready to lose my mind!" Grumbled Ahsoka.

"Maybe we should have brought C-3PO with us." Said Anakin, not looking up from the wall carvings.

"Seriously, Skyguy? In a place like this?" She imitated his voice. "My internal circuit processors have been fried!"

"Sucks to be you." Said Anakin.

"Hang on. I think I've got it." Ahsoka pushed the stone wheel around and aligned it with the glyphs on the wall.

"ar"  
"ei"  
"orsedd"  
"ddu"  
"yn"  
"y"  
"gwallgofrwydd"  
"ni"  
"all"  
"yr"  
"anhrefn"  
"niwclear"  
"feddwl"  
"na"  
"gweld"

"Ar ei orsedd ddu yn y gwallgofrwydd ni all yr anhrefn niwclear feddwl na gweld" Said Ahsoka.

"Bless you." Said Anakin.

"Ar ei orsedd ddu yn y gwallgofrwydd ni all yr anhrefn niwclear feddwl na gweld-blehhh, you need to do a lot of lingual acrobatics to pronounce that one." Said Ahsoka. She then closed her eyes and attempted to commit the phrase to memory.

"Ar ei orsedd ddu yn y gwallgofrwydd ni all yr anhrefn niwclear feddwl na gweld  
Ar ei orsedd ddu yn y gwallgofrwydd ni all yr anhrefn niwclear feddwl na gweld  
Ar ei orsedd ddu yn y gwallgofrwydd ni all yr anhrefn niwclear feddwl na gweld  
Ar ei orsedd ddu yn y gwallgofrwydd ni all yr anhrefn niwclear feddwl na gweld  
Ar ei orsedd ddu yn y gwallgofrwydd ni all yr anhrefn niwclear feddwl na gweld  
Ar ei orsedd ddu yn y gwallgofrwydd ni all yr anhrefn niwclear feddwl na gweld  
ar ei orsedd ddu yn y gwallgofrwydd ni all yr anhrefn niwclear feddwl na gweld." She repeated over and over again, very fast.

"You sure your vocal apparatus is intended to make those sounds?" Said Anakin.

"Probably not but I felt a compulsion to commit that phrase to memory." Said Ahsoka.

"Well over here, it seems these pictures tell a story of beings thar are older than the galaxy, and the boss of them all is this blob on a black throne who is an omnipotent blind idiot, who is lulled by the sound of flutes and percussion. This planet is the gateway to its realm or something, as you can see" He pointed to the pictures. "And this picture here depicts the vast majority of what they do." There were reliefs of odd-looking beings row by row, but they only recognized one of them.

"Doesn't that one there resemble the steward of this planet?" Said Ahsoka. She pointed to the carving of the figure that was standing in front of a gate.

"It does. And if he's standing in front of a gate could that mean he's master of the gates between dimensions?" Said Anakin.

"I don't know. I just didn't think he was too happy to see us. Let's see if there's something under here." They went over to the trapdoor at the edge of the room. They pried it open and peered in, Nothing but darkness yawned at them.

"Ladies first." Said Anakin as he shoved Ahsoka in.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!" She screamed, her voice trailed off.

"Snips? That must be a long fall." Anakin jumped in after her.

Anakin hit the floor with a thump. The drop was less than eight feet.

Ahsoka was laughing hysterically. "I had you going! You really thought I would be falling for hours! What a riot."

They then turned to find a rectangular slab in the middle of the room that was shrouded by a white sheet. They then removed the sheet to find a single instrument, its long, narrow blade hollow and three-sided.

"What's that?" Said Anakin.

"It's a trocar. It's used to suck out fluids from bodily cavities." Said Ahsoka. She picked it up.

"Don't touch that. It might have germs." Said Anakin.

"And this is coming from a guy who keeps a piss jug on long flights." Ahsoka then bit the trocar and inspected it for teeth marks.

"Don't put that in your mouth! You don't know where that's been." Said Anakin.

"I wish I knew what type of metal this was." Said Ahsoka. "It's very durable." She put the trocar down where she found it. "But it has a really nasty aftertaste."

They went in separate ways to inspect the basement for any information that might be of use. Then something dawned on Anakin. He picked up the sheet, put it over his head, and snuck up behind Ahsoka.

"RAAR!"

She screamed and turned. Her face was ashen and her eyes were wide as saucers.

"You're not actually scared of me, Snips?"

"I'm not scared of you, I'm scared of what's behind you!" Said Ahsoka.

Anakin removed the sheet to find a monstrous, oozy, tarry, bubbling creature whose bubbles turned to eyes that then floated away and popped while tarry black tendrils extended in all directions. It made a disgusting, smacking, sticky noise.

"Let's get out of here!" Ahsoka jumped to her feet.

"Not so fast." Anakin ignited his lightsaber.

"Yes so fast!" Ahsoka took off running.

"You have to face your fears." Said Anakin as he engaged the creature.

Ahsoa cringed, shoved some facial tissues up her nose to block out the stench of the creature, ignited her lightsaber, and charged.

"It's like it's no use fighting this thing!" Said Ahsoka. "Like cutting through water!" The creature wrapped a tarry tendril around her ankle but she leapt back before it could ensnare her.

More of the creatures slithered out of the darkness.

"I don't like these odds." Said Ahsoka. "Let's get outta here!"

"For once you're right, Snips." Anakin attached his lightsaber to his belt and took off running after Ahsoka.

"Skyguy! Give me a boost!" Anakin raised Ahsoka up through the trapdoor and into the hall and then hoisted himself up. More of the creatures had filled the room.

"Let's get back to our ship." Said Ahsoka as the ran out the door. The sun was just about to rise, making the sky look menacing in the liminal light. More of the creatures were riding over the heights and encroaching in on them.

"Where did we land our ship?" Said Anakin.

"I don't know but we're not stopping until we get there!" Ahsoka yelled.

"There it is! Dead ahead!" Said Anakin.

"It's closer than I thought." Said Ahsoka.

"And someone even fixed the landing gear." Said Anakin. They vaulted into the cockpit and took off into the light scattering sky.

Ahsoka didn't catch her breath until they were in outer space.

"That's seven hours, thirteen minutes, and four seconds I'm not getting back." Said Ahsoka.

"Don't be a negative Nelly, Snips. I'm sure we got something out of it. I don't know what, but I'm sure we did." Said Anakin as he pulled the lever to lightspeed.

\- -  
"Did you learn anything on that planet?" Obi-Wan asked Anakin and Ahsoka when they arrived on Corusant.

"Absolutely nothing." Said Anakin.

"Absolutely nothing? I find that suspicious." Said Obi-Wan.

"The ruler insists on neutrality, and the residents all have bad tempers, no intelligence, and no fondness for humanity." Said Anakin.

"I did however learn how to say 'ar ei orsedd ddu yn y gwallgofrwydd ni all yr anhrefn niwclear feddwl na gweld'" Said Ahsoka.

"Bless you." Said Obi-wan. "I'll take it you didn't learn how to pronounce that in one sitting."

"Actually I did. Say it a few times and it will roll right off your tongue. Ar ei orsedd ddu yn y gwallgofrwydd ni all yr anhrefn niwclear feddwl na gweld." Ahsoka repeated.

"Hey Snips, if you promise me never to repeat that phrase again I'll take you to that planet where it's always summer and people eat deep fried swamp creatures and drink mind-altering cocktails." Said Anakin.

Ahsoka's eyes lit up. "Speak no further!" She said.

"No, you speak no further!" Said Anakin.

"No, you speak no further!" Said Ahsoka.

"No, you speak no further!" Said Anakin.

"No, you speak no further!" Said Ahsoka.

Anakin and Ahsoka then erupted into peals of laughter.


End file.
